It’s easy to forget to care for yourself when you’re grieving.  Although it might feel difficult to even think about self-care right now, small, simple, actions to support your physical and emotional wellbeing can help you navigate this challenging time.

Care for Your Body

• Nourish yourself. You may not feel hungry but try eating smaller, healthier meals or snacks to keep up your energy. When you can, stock up on soups or healthy ‘ready’ meals to keep in your freezer, light meals that take little or no preparation and suit your dietary requirements.
• Sleep is restorative and vital to health. Because sleep can be disrupted, rest or take a nap whenever you can. Stick to your usual sleep routine wherever possible. Natural supplements like herbal teas and warm milk can often help but if sleep eludes you for too long, talk to a health professional to see what might help.
• Limit alcohol and stimulants. These may numb or heighten emotions, but in the long term, if relied on too much, they can create other health problems.
• Take gentle exercise. Yoga, meditation, even a short walk can help relieve stress and boost your mood and energy, or if you’re used to exercise, resume playing sport, going to the gym, running or dancing.

Honour Your Emotions

In grief, we need to take time to mourn what has been lost. But we can’t heal what we don’t feel or are avoiding feeling. So, step aside on purpose from time to time. Make space to tune in to how you really are feeling with self-compassion:

• Let your feelings surface. Remember, reminisce and acknowledge what’s been lost. It’s okay to cry, feel angry, hurt or sad.
• Grieve on your own terms. Others may tell of their own experience of grief, or they may suggest it’s time to “move on” but we are all unique, so we can’t compare ourselves to someone else’s experience. Healthy grieving doesn’t mean ‘getting over’ a loss but learning to live meaningfully while carrying the loss.
• When you’re ready to do so, express your feelings through talking, journalling, arts and crafts, or contributing to a cause close to your loss experience.
• Prepare for emotional triggers. It’s quite natural for anniversaries, holidays, familiar places or music to trigger grief., however the intensity of these responses diminishes over time. Try to plan support around certain occasions, or find your own unique way to mark the moment and honour your memories.

Connect With Others

The early days of grief can be exhausting and it’s easy to find yourself withdrawing from your usual social circles.  Seeking your own private space for a while can help you to cope and adjust to what’s changed. But self-isolating for too long periods, can also have a negative impact, so whenever possible:

• Stay connected to friends, family, faith communities, clubs, or coworkers, and let them help if they want to.
• Sometimes people don’t know how they can be of help, so it can be important to let them know how. Whether it’s cooking a meal, mowing the lawn, picking up some groceries, sitting with you and just being present, most people want to support you. We all have emotional support friends and practical support friends; you just need to work out who may be better at doing what.
• Talk about your loved one even if tears come, and share stories. The person who has been lost may not physically be here anymore, but the place they hold in your heart continues to be affirmed. Healing doesn’t mean forgetting, it means learning to live with love and loss side by side.
• You don’t need to talk about your grief every time however—sometimes it’s just a comfort to be surrounded by people who care for you and be present. Stay as long as you feel comfortable, it’s ok to make outings shorter in the beginning.